People and Thoughts

So, yesterday while i finished the gym and started walking out, i was trying to revisit my new year resolutions mentally, and gosh.. I didn't blog for a month, I thought what was it that I was planning to write the last time I blogged, I was to right about people and thoughts., When I initially thought about the topic I thought I should write about what I think about various people i've come across, Suddenly I realized how does that help me, It'd be more a gossip column, So I'm now switching on to what is it that attracts me in people.. and of course try to improvise on many of the qualities which i have and many which I don't.

So here I go with the list of characteristics, that I admire and think a blend of all this in a person would make one a very interesting human.. 

In Kids

Of course the Smile - I think a kids smile is genuine & Divine.

Mischief - I love mischief, in fact my mind still works of what to do next, Not to harm people but some kind of pleasure to irritate. And yes I get irritated too. I don't claim to be a big sport.. despite that fact I still love irritating people.

Curiosity - A Child's Curiosity is their building block to knowledge they gain. Their adaptation to the environment they are in is amazing.

In Others... 

Well there are various things that attract me. Many of which comes by practice. 

One who has Positive Attitude - "Wherever you go no matter what the weather is bring your own sunshine", comes more by practice than naturally, I have couple of friends who adapt themselves to what situation they have and excel, not because they accepted a failure, but because they believe 'misery or happiness the effort is the same'.  I love to be around such people because the attitude  is contagious :). I've heard a lot of times from Kashyap about his running coach who coaches and motivates people , he is a live wire, a lot of energy and a lot of positive attitude.

One Who Accept Faults - I find that it's very difficult to accept faults if someone points out . I have that problem too, probably i put forth a defensive argument, unless i realize it myself. It gives a great relief if you try not to be defensive and accept the fault.But beware of those who wait to point out :). 

One who is Composed - Many of us are temperamental, I've met one of Kashyap's cousin who happens to be a doctor, and is composed, may be the profession demands it, or by habit, I'm amazed by that nature. He might have his downtimes too, but as far as I know his talks, his lifestyle, his temperament are worth motivating.

One who tries to keep in touch with all his well wishers every now and then , out of love and concern than as formality, One habit I have to develop. I just can't check on people unless I have a necessity, or I want to share something. I don't know if I will improve , but let me try. One of my new year resolution was to weed out friends who don't care for you. But I now doubt, because I don't keep in touch with everyone I know they'll weed me out :)

Modesty : Those achievers who have worked hard through their life, have excelled in their profession, but yet are modest about it. I observe that people who are modest, also do not have the 'I' factor, appreciate hard work, opportunity, and circumstances.  I'm not against material possessions, If you have enough, you can spend enough but am definitely against pompousness.

On the lighter side.

Intelligence , Wit and Social  - Intelligence, Any person whom I can have interesting conversations with or gives me information regarding something, other than gossip/small talk, Witty people, Keeps me happy, I have couple of friends who have amazing sense of humor, I can't stop laughing with them around. I can laugh at the most silliest of jokes , even after hours it's been said. I love to be amidst people who laugh.

Hyperactive - My mom, I have no other definition for it :). I'm close, but definitely not like her. She has a lot of positive energy about her, She says there are no problems, just challenges, if you've to face it you've have to. Smart, Social, helpful, talkative, tactful,practical,efficient,lives more by example than advice and hyperactive. Except for her temperament.. I think many of them are temperamental... 

Travelers - I could be wrong, but i feel, people who are well travelled have better sense of appreciation of things they have/possess. I personally love to travel a lot. So i think there's a natural affinity towards them.

Interested in Philosophy - I used to have terrific conversations with one of my neighbor on the various philosophical aspects of our rituals, he was an older man and a great scholar, he always said, Hinduism is not about religion, it's more about practicing social life, the problem either we have misinterpreted or never understood it because of the way it's been passed through generations mostly orally. I can't spend most of my time talking only about this, but definitely i'd like to discuss it with people. 

 And of course All those 12th Std , Bsc Final Years, BE Final semesters, Studious kids. Healthy competition is good.

I've met a lot more people whom I admire and respect, I just can't think of all the qualities right now. 

The Latest Book I Read - Book Review on Outliers

It's been a while since I blogged, Many reasons to it, I was studying for PMP so thought i'd be wasting my time if I spent long time blogging. Secondly, I had to finish / start reading a book before I write a book review. Thirdly, Obvious Laziness.

So, I'm currently reading this book called 'Outliers - The Story of Success'  - Malcolm Gladwell. I didn't finish the book yet, but in the couple of chapters I read i had contradictory opinions about what the author wanted to convey. 

Before I write them, The meaning of 'Outlier' is one who is different from the usual. 

I read the first 2 chapters, Chapter 1 talks about a place called Roseto where everyone was healthy not because of food, exercise,genes ,weather or any healthy practices but because of the simple reason that multiple generations lived as a family under one roof, (Joint-Family), 

I agree partially to it, because you have experienced people to share your thoughts, relieve your stress and youngsters to keep you happy. But How cannot Lifestyle not attribute to one's health? The author claims that the average life span of every individual was greater than an average american for this simple reason. 

He continues to discuss about cut off dates in school system , points out the fact that , If you take 2 kids from the opposite ends of a cut-off date, Example September 1 being the cut off dates, Opposite Ends means January 1, and August 30. He says the kid with January 1 date of birth will be a little more smarter and hence will be groomed much better than the kid who was born in August!!, Tries to prove it with some statistical data, but out of experience i don't consider this true. Here he introduces the concept of 'Accumulative Advantage' - Meaning, because the kid is slightly smarter, he is given the attention and so becomes more smarter than the others. 

The third point is the age old saying 'Practice makes a man Perfect', agreed to this fact , but then he claims that there is nothing called born genius, Not anyone is gifted , It's only practice that makes a person outstanding than the others!, Agreed practice is necessary, but no one is gifted!, I find it difficult to agree.

I'll read further and comment about it, Do let me know your thoughts on what the author thinks.

What does it feel like to dance?

Art is expression, This would be an understatement. It is what makes life beautiful and colorful, i've observed that every individual is passionate about some form of art or the other, be it music, books, dance, photography, sculpting, painting, knitting, exercising, list is end less. 

Being a South Indian and brought up in Madras, I've a natural affiliation towards music and dance, for me that's the best form of expression. Music energizes me, No matter how gloomy the days are or how happier they are. You could care the least about the world when favorite song of yours is being played, be it meru samana, or samney yeh kaun aaya, or you say best , when you say nothing at all.. , 

So when I say music, dance has to be mentioned , we were watching 'The Story of India' on Tv, when Michael woods mentioned about 'Nataraja ' symbolizing the dance of creation. I'm lost when I see people dance, Past few days I've been listening to Andela Ravamidi, I love this song because of the concept song, The song is performed by a girl who realizes that this form of art can enrich her soul. & Bhanupriya was outstanding in that.

I'm a huge fan of Bharatnatyam and Kuchipudi (vakyartha abhinayam), So much so that I can spend time researching about it and not get bored. I secretly wish I can dance and sway the way these dancers do. 

Ever felt sweat and the rain together?Ever spread your hands wide at the shore of an ocean and felt that you have hugged the ocean and the sky together? Ever stopped at a favorite song of yours while rushing for a bus ? Ever searched for 2 years to find the rendition of that one song you heard in a concert? Ever lost in the dance performed by people on stage.? Ever felt the energy flowing in when you hit the dance floor? It's a wonderful feeling. Inexplicable. 

Dance and music is what adds life to otherwise routine chores.

My New Year Resolutions

Well, This is the time of the year where you have to make some resolutions. So i'm making them public because, I'll be conscious that I announced it to the Whole world, so I better do it, just in case I ignore. :)

So here's the big list :)

a) Loose Weight - Obviously, Those of you who know me, know how important it is. Besides the health reasons, to look beautiful :).

b) Blog : I've put this into practice, I'm writing , I'd like to continue.

c) Laugh as much as I can : I used to be a paranoid, I've controlled it a lot. Would like to improve on it, worry less and enjoy from deep inside the heart.  Laugh out loud :)

d) Get back to reading : I used to read,  I'd like to continue. It's a pleasure for sure.

e) Weed out friends/ relatives : Will keep in touch with only those people who I know care for us. Have time for us, this is something I do every year. But this year organize it a little better. Call friends once in a while may be a month and keep in touch with them.

f) Travel Once a Year : It's too beautiful out there to sit at home or work overboard, It's good to take a break, it's too much of a luxury to keep traveling frequently. So as of now i'd like to travel to a new place , once a year for a week.

g) Hairstyle - Find a hairstyle that suits me :).. Not a big one but definitely will add to my looks ;)

i) Carnatic Music - It's been my dream to sing a 'Jagadananda Karaka' in the correct sruthi. I'm learning music, I hope i get to sing a lot more carnatic songs. 

j) Music Maniac : I was a maniac for good music, I want to restore that. 

k) Trekking / Hiking - We used to hike , pre-pregnancy. I'd love to get back to that.

l) Pooja : When my parents were here, they were sincere and performing pooja every day. I want to keep that tradition, not because anyone would question me if I don't, but because I want to.

m) Meet people over weekends or do something interesting over the weekends : This is more of my husbands resolution , than mine. So We plan to host parties or meet people over saturday nights. Either go out together or play games at home.

I also have a things to do list and a Wish list , Which i don't plan to make public. 

I'll see how many of it i'm trying and will accomplish , every month.

The quotes I'd like to follow this year : 

This used to be there in one of the boards in covansys)

If You think you can  or If You think you can't you are right.

This is from Swamy (Sri sathya sai baba).

What you get in life is destiny, how you deal with it is self-effort.

My thoughts as a Cook

I love to cook. As long as there is a change in the food , I can make something new every day. But ask me to make the same food every day , I'm bored as hell. Except for a good coffee of course, (I'm always ready to make it).

So, I don't have a sweet tooth, I make sweets though. My favorites these days have been the various cuisine with the same ingredients. I downloaded the Khana Khazana book with various cuisines.

With my husband around, I need to make good food that is healthier, yet tastier, and non-repetitive with the same ingredients but a variety every day.

Be it soups, be it salads, be it paruppu sadam or be it pindi miriyam. It must be ' BP -Free' ,'Cholestrol - Free ' and ' Diabetic - Free ', 'Less - Carb' (You know what I mean).

So these days, When i go to a store to pick up something  I started reading recipes behind the ingredients pack, and started making them. So the latest discovery in that has been the Vermicelli Pulao .

We don't eat rice, we cannot eat only the vegetables , so we need some base to  eat the vegetables with  and there are lot of constraints. My mom went crazy when she was here, She was like how do i invent what to make day in and day out. 

Thanks to the web, I don't have such problems. With my son growing, I wonder what his taste buds would demand. 

I'm happy with the challenges i face for making food every day :).

Thoughts on new recipes , new cuisines with all conditions met are welcome :)

Hairstyle gone bad...

I'm a great fan of my hair but not my hairstyle. My hair is balck, long ,wavy and healthy. But I have a great problem styling it, not because it's difficult but a simple fact that I don't know how to style. I never gave it a thought until kashyap told me that hair should be styled to look good. In my quest for a nice hair style, i've tried a variety of things.

Flattening it with a flat iron, My hair becomes straight , i don't have to do anything after that. Much more manageable , looks less in volume , sleek. But unfortunately I'm not a fan of straight hair. I like the natural look to my hair , than straightening it every time. Once in a while it's fine but not day in day out. 

Then, i went to a hair stylist , actually asking her to layer my hair and she gave me a lecture on how curly my hair is and why she won't do what i ask her to do. I pay her , fight with her, spoil my hair too and achieve nothing at the end of it.

Now I bore kashyap with various websites asking him if the hairstyle is good. I go to the stores and check out products from anti-frizz, to moist, to conditioners, to sleek look , and everything under the sun. My latest discovery in this field is the TRESemme anti-frizz creme. I don't know if it'll help me in anyway. 

I know what i need but I don't know who does it. I need frizz free, layered, wavy with few curls, in the right place that is easily manageable.

I'll wait till i find the right hairstyle for my hair, and probably have that beautiful wavy hair of Madhuri , or Bipasha or Kajol or Drew barrymore :).. 

 

Any tips with hair maintenance and the right parlors for a hair style is appreciated 

What does it take to turn 60..

In the past few years 4 of them I knew turned 60. My dad, One of kashyap's aunt, His dad and his sisters father in law. The least celebrated of all was my dad's of course.. We did not even gift him anything.. :).

Anyways, So what does it take to turn 60?. I remember the phrase which says " You can sleep through the years and become old or you can live through the years and become wise". All these four must have had different lives. Had varied experiences , Some to remember some to forget.

The only person whom i have seen close to live through the years is my dad. So my thoughts about turning 60 or older are based on my personal experiences in observing my dad.

I think he lives by the philosophy " This too shall pass.. ".. He was a science graduate , loved biology, wanted a career in that direction, But he moved on to history instead, later to get a Phd in the field of Epigraphy. So that was a change which he had to accept. I'm sure he must have had ambitions and desires like most of us do in his youth, Married my mom, Moved to mysore. Well moving to mysore in those days was probably like moving to a different country these days. You can imagine how they had to adapt. 

My dad's strength, his weakness, his sorrow, his joy,  his love, his fears, his friend, his backbone is my mom. A relation  which they have built over years, Of course any relation comes with it's share of complaints about each other. They might not be the most perfect pair who have complimented each other, but they definitely have built a very strong relationship among themselves and for the family. 

A family is the most secure feeling which probably is the best. In fact as far as I'm concerned i think i get hurt the most when i feel insecure.. or I remember those moments distinctly in my life when I have felt insecure vividly with the days I've felt happier.

Anyones life comes with their share of ups and downs so did his, be it health, be it financial, be it compromise. Together along with mom they gave us the best, morals, culture, education, lessons on friends, fitting in society, people & behaviour, places, travel, finance, of course, laughter, tears all living by example, not advised but actually showed us how to be through it. Out of the many things that influenced me one of the important things was how to face situations in life , It's a four principled formula work towards solving, face it with silence, have patience, when through it forget it.. 

So, that was their adulthood working to make lives better for us. Taking decisions for the family cart to run smooth. Fulfilling their wish to build a nice little home for themselves , a good retired life with some savings. Of course, educating kids, seeing them settle in a job,  getting them married.  Nothing out of the ordinary. A normal life. 

So obviously to turn 60 takes an emotional roller coaster ride. 

I remember,

the day I got married and the happiness on my parents face, wishing me happiness for my life.

the day when kashyap first arrived at the chennai airport and the anxiety my parents had in their face.

the day when I managed to get a set in engineering of course in the payment quota, not in the regular one... and the anger they had towards unkown.. :)

The day when they were proud that they own their own home with the loan  paid off.., Their first TV, Their first fridge, their first vehicle, their first telephone.. 

the day I landed in India after marriage and my visit to the hospital where my dad cried out so loud , out of frustration, pain, anger, and a desire to live.

the days when I was moved to tears when my dad said being in the ICU " I have to get you married  " in Chennai , "I didn't see kashyap after your marriage, can you ask him to come now .." in Hyderabad, " Take care of my daughter, she's a child and she's nice ".. over phone just before his third operation last year. 

I call it self-respect.. others call it "mohamatam", of not taking anything from anyone.. not even us kids... My dad thinks it's an insult. I know he loves cameras, he loves biscuits, he loves to try new things, But the pride always stops him from asking.He says if you want something ask me.. I'll give it to you. 

I'm sure for many of them it takes a similar route. My brother will have his share of experiences with my dad.., Wow.. He must have seen so much change.. and now when i see him play with arnav.. i see the child of course a matured child :)..  

Probably it takes a lot to be 60... You have to live it , build a personality of your own, Gain respect within your family being both an individual and a part and a lot more small things that make a big picture. 

   

When things go overboard...

Most of the times we do see what lies in front of us, It's not that all of a sudden something just strikes us. Off late i started believing that nothing happens without our knowledge.. We can predict what will happen if we are not careful with certain things.

It's a bad feeling when someone you trust just takes you for granted and goes overboard. & is not guilty of what they do. You don't know whether out of love you'll have to excuse them and take all the grief and burden to yourself or just be strict about the whole thing. No matter what you do out of the both. The feeling that remains is very unpleasant.

Sometimes it's good when elders too do a study of themselves as of what they have achieved in their lives, it's time they introspect and not take anyone for granted. Everyone is an individual human and everyone have their stand and limits, it'll be good if that's respected.

I keep my fingers crossed so things do change.