Hairstyle gone bad...

I'm a great fan of my hair but not my hairstyle. My hair is balck, long ,wavy and healthy. But I have a great problem styling it, not because it's difficult but a simple fact that I don't know how to style. I never gave it a thought until kashyap told me that hair should be styled to look good. In my quest for a nice hair style, i've tried a variety of things.

Flattening it with a flat iron, My hair becomes straight , i don't have to do anything after that. Much more manageable , looks less in volume , sleek. But unfortunately I'm not a fan of straight hair. I like the natural look to my hair , than straightening it every time. Once in a while it's fine but not day in day out. 

Then, i went to a hair stylist , actually asking her to layer my hair and she gave me a lecture on how curly my hair is and why she won't do what i ask her to do. I pay her , fight with her, spoil my hair too and achieve nothing at the end of it.

Now I bore kashyap with various websites asking him if the hairstyle is good. I go to the stores and check out products from anti-frizz, to moist, to conditioners, to sleek look , and everything under the sun. My latest discovery in this field is the TRESemme anti-frizz creme. I don't know if it'll help me in anyway. 

I know what i need but I don't know who does it. I need frizz free, layered, wavy with few curls, in the right place that is easily manageable.

I'll wait till i find the right hairstyle for my hair, and probably have that beautiful wavy hair of Madhuri , or Bipasha or Kajol or Drew barrymore :).. 

 

Any tips with hair maintenance and the right parlors for a hair style is appreciated 

What does it take to turn 60..

In the past few years 4 of them I knew turned 60. My dad, One of kashyap's aunt, His dad and his sisters father in law. The least celebrated of all was my dad's of course.. We did not even gift him anything.. :).

Anyways, So what does it take to turn 60?. I remember the phrase which says " You can sleep through the years and become old or you can live through the years and become wise". All these four must have had different lives. Had varied experiences , Some to remember some to forget.

The only person whom i have seen close to live through the years is my dad. So my thoughts about turning 60 or older are based on my personal experiences in observing my dad.

I think he lives by the philosophy " This too shall pass.. ".. He was a science graduate , loved biology, wanted a career in that direction, But he moved on to history instead, later to get a Phd in the field of Epigraphy. So that was a change which he had to accept. I'm sure he must have had ambitions and desires like most of us do in his youth, Married my mom, Moved to mysore. Well moving to mysore in those days was probably like moving to a different country these days. You can imagine how they had to adapt. 

My dad's strength, his weakness, his sorrow, his joy,  his love, his fears, his friend, his backbone is my mom. A relation  which they have built over years, Of course any relation comes with it's share of complaints about each other. They might not be the most perfect pair who have complimented each other, but they definitely have built a very strong relationship among themselves and for the family. 

A family is the most secure feeling which probably is the best. In fact as far as I'm concerned i think i get hurt the most when i feel insecure.. or I remember those moments distinctly in my life when I have felt insecure vividly with the days I've felt happier.

Anyones life comes with their share of ups and downs so did his, be it health, be it financial, be it compromise. Together along with mom they gave us the best, morals, culture, education, lessons on friends, fitting in society, people & behaviour, places, travel, finance, of course, laughter, tears all living by example, not advised but actually showed us how to be through it. Out of the many things that influenced me one of the important things was how to face situations in life , It's a four principled formula work towards solving, face it with silence, have patience, when through it forget it.. 

So, that was their adulthood working to make lives better for us. Taking decisions for the family cart to run smooth. Fulfilling their wish to build a nice little home for themselves , a good retired life with some savings. Of course, educating kids, seeing them settle in a job,  getting them married.  Nothing out of the ordinary. A normal life. 

So obviously to turn 60 takes an emotional roller coaster ride. 

I remember,

the day I got married and the happiness on my parents face, wishing me happiness for my life.

the day when kashyap first arrived at the chennai airport and the anxiety my parents had in their face.

the day when I managed to get a set in engineering of course in the payment quota, not in the regular one... and the anger they had towards unkown.. :)

The day when they were proud that they own their own home with the loan  paid off.., Their first TV, Their first fridge, their first vehicle, their first telephone.. 

the day I landed in India after marriage and my visit to the hospital where my dad cried out so loud , out of frustration, pain, anger, and a desire to live.

the days when I was moved to tears when my dad said being in the ICU " I have to get you married  " in Chennai , "I didn't see kashyap after your marriage, can you ask him to come now .." in Hyderabad, " Take care of my daughter, she's a child and she's nice ".. over phone just before his third operation last year. 

I call it self-respect.. others call it "mohamatam", of not taking anything from anyone.. not even us kids... My dad thinks it's an insult. I know he loves cameras, he loves biscuits, he loves to try new things, But the pride always stops him from asking.He says if you want something ask me.. I'll give it to you. 

I'm sure for many of them it takes a similar route. My brother will have his share of experiences with my dad.., Wow.. He must have seen so much change.. and now when i see him play with arnav.. i see the child of course a matured child :)..  

Probably it takes a lot to be 60... You have to live it , build a personality of your own, Gain respect within your family being both an individual and a part and a lot more small things that make a big picture. 

   

When things go overboard...

Most of the times we do see what lies in front of us, It's not that all of a sudden something just strikes us. Off late i started believing that nothing happens without our knowledge.. We can predict what will happen if we are not careful with certain things.

It's a bad feeling when someone you trust just takes you for granted and goes overboard. & is not guilty of what they do. You don't know whether out of love you'll have to excuse them and take all the grief and burden to yourself or just be strict about the whole thing. No matter what you do out of the both. The feeling that remains is very unpleasant.

Sometimes it's good when elders too do a study of themselves as of what they have achieved in their lives, it's time they introspect and not take anyone for granted. Everyone is an individual human and everyone have their stand and limits, it'll be good if that's respected.

I keep my fingers crossed so things do change.

Cilantro Rice and Black Beans..

I finally made the cilantro rice which I have been planning to make for past few months, From the time I saw Rachel Ray's Show..

So , It was not so simple to make.

I took about an hour and half.. Thanks to the handsome guy with me.. He allowed me to cook.

So i made brown rice, cooked with vegetable stock of course..

Then I pressure cooked the black beans, And to spice up I used the Chinese 'Five Spice' Recipe..

I had Star anise with me for probably 2 years now :).. I finally used it for the Five spice recipe..

And ofcourse the Cilantro Pesto..

Overall it was a heavy dinner.. a good one too..

Made brown rice today too.. , and back to sambar . :).

I Think Therefore I am..

Everyday I discover something new about myself.... I find the quoted text describes how I am ..

" An insatiable curiosity through which one explores and learns about the world in which one lives. The world of ideas is a playground in which you roam. The magic of the mind enchants , as one idea captivates your imagination after another. Meeting people, traveling, reading, talking and learning are all means to gain a viewpoint on your own personal identity. Don't let your identity rest on ideas, but rather on the very nature of the mind itself. Thoughts are fleeting but mental activity is endless. Need variety and stimulation. This can involve travel, communication, talking to people - anything which gives the opportunity to develop your mind and contact others."

Love for Beverages..

People who have tasted filter coffee surely do understand my love for it. Everytime I used to pass by coffee day stores , the fresh beans and the coffee powder used to awaken my senses.

There used to be this coffee stall , at cafe covansys in chennai, Probably me and friends used to spend at least 10 rupees a day at the coffee stall, And an hour at the cafe.. , It was fun, That strong coffee with the right amount of sugar.

Wake up in the morning to a fresh cup of hot filter coffee, that's how my day used to begin earlier. I was a coffee addict.

Now I quit, almost, But I have to try real hard to resist.

I crave for it these days, you work in the City , with starbucks in every other corner, How can you not drink coffee? It's just irresistable,

But I've almost given , thinking of how my intestines would react to caffine & milk.

I like tea too, but not as much as coffee, the taste of the coffee that remains on your taste buds, the very feeling is awesome. Tea does not have that charm, Probably good after a heavy dinner/lunch, but can never be a substitute for coffee.

To avoid caffine i drink lemon tea these days, Can't believe i've been So good :).

I wish the days are back when i can drink coffee again without any fear :).

A hot cup of coffee, a nice book of your choice, some old hindi songs (probably mukesh, manna dey or rafi) , and a nice warm day, That would make my day, and no other thoughts :)

I'm reminded of cup& saucer in chennai, A nice cozy place with a view of the Adayar Road..

Wish I can visit that place with all my friends when I go to chennai.

Super Bowl XLII Party at Our Place.

This is my second super bowl experience, Last year it was comical for Kashyap & I , because we saw it together at home.., I was trying to keep up the spirit of super bowl but he decided that he'd never watch it with me again.

This year, however we had an unexpected party at home. Call it 'TV Warming' , We invited all his cousins and one of his friends. I call it unexpected because of the turnout, We thought no one would show up , and we'll have to iterate last year super bowl. We did not want to go anywhere else to watch coz we got our new TV , & our new TV Stand. It was fun to watch the super bowl, Though the match wasn't interesting in the first 3 quarters, with neither of the teams scoring beyond their initial score, The 4th Quarter was splendid.It was not just the match but the audience too, One Kashyap's nephew was literally praying that patriots should win :).. Poor kid was pretty disappointed , so we thought we'll cheer him up by cutting a cake for the spirit of super bowl.

Like with any super bowl, 'Junk Food' was the main eat, Of course followed by a light Indian dinner and a nice big bye to everyone.

Overall it was gr8 fun experience, and hope to repeat it every year.

Mitral Valve Stenosis

As I was reading my profile and about me I re-read "Sometimes I believe in Fate and Sometimes I believe in Myself", It's a contradiction, But how do you define this scenario a play of fate or ignorance of someone.

Mitral Valve stenosis is narrowing of mitral valve, which makes the heart difficult to pump blood to the rest of the body, General problems and symptoms include angina, shortness of breath sometimes edema. It's caused due to rheumatic fever in kids, which when not treated in proper time can lead to this problem. The problem is not immediately noticed until mid age , may be late 20's or early 30's.

You have to be on medication consistently, generally patients are treated with anti-coagulents, so that blood becomes thinner. and it's easier to flow.

My dad had this problem... , He Went through open heart surgery - A surgery to repair the valve so that it aids in proper blood flow, then 15 years later a balloon valvoplasty, this did not cure his problem but further complicated it. He suffered from angina frequently, he used to sweat sometimes. He used to have shortness of breath. All this led to atrial fibrillation, A stage where heart looses it's regular rhythm and beats much faster than the regular self. Medicines are given to slow the heart rate. If the palpitation continues it can lead to stroke or a heart attack.

Now, things went on further, He started having calcification, of course visit to the hospital ICU multiple times because of fibrillation, and before his latest operation, he had a 90% blockage.
Doctors suggested bypass and a valve replacement.

Thank god the operation was successful , he is recovering and doing a lot better than what we have seen him in the past few years.

So , what do you call this an act of fate or if my grandparents would have got the treatment for rheumatic fever at the right time he would not have had this. Remember those were the days when medical facilities were not so advanced.

So , Sometimes when you are helpless.. do you just blame it on fate to keep your peace?

What is good about Programming?

As a "software" consultant, I develop software too. I use all the fancy stuff in java enterprise application development, Spring , Hibernate, Tiger. While I was debugging, today , I realised that the so called software does not have too many complicated algorithms. We hardly use any may be, We do a lot of business logic though , With While , For and If conditions. But not any complicated algorithms. Anything complicated seems to be abstracted in something called the Framework. If you know certain level of programming and good at logic you can manage through it.

But is that enough for being a good Java Consultant?, One of my friends called me up and asked me if I could send some tips for Java/J2EE interview questions, because she wanted to be prepared for an interview. Interviews are different , they ask you questions like, In Java do you use Pass By Value or Pass By Reference, Or Tell me how do you import a text file. Or How can you make a method Singleton, What is the difference between Synchronized Block and a Synchronized Method.
So, When you Actually program , You just pass "parameters" and check if the values are correct/ incorrect. How many times do you care that are you passing by value or passing by reference. I understand that it's important to know the concept, But do you actually think when you are programming?.

In our MCA Program, We struggle through to do our algorithms. There's an entire book on various algorithms, But how many do you use , It depends on the kind of programming line you get into, at least 60% of them , program only the business logic , Which is more about the business than about using algorithms.


I talk as a general programmer, Many of them might not agree, As architects or as programmers developing products, things might be different. I have no experience to talk on that :)

A new Found Hobby

Summer is here, After the few dull months of Cold & Shiver, lazing around at home making excuses.. that it's winter, We finally got into an active life. We started to hike - a New Found Hobby. Both of us are outdoor people, Ask us to party a whole day out of home we'd love to.

So what's so good about hiking, After all you just walk. Back in India, People go for long walks day in and day out, for shopping groceries, doctors, medical stores, exercise, on the beach. You name it you can find people walking.

So what's the big deal about hiking, Why is it an activity here. Everything is organized here, so for all the chores you go around in a vehicle, invariably a car, Find a parking close to the entrance of the store. So, walking as an exercise is as good as none at all. And , so we end up hiking.

There are designated places where you can walk. These are called trails. They range anywhere from a mile to 17-18 miles, Your fitness level and time decides on how much you can walk.


--NOTE - I had earlier posted this in a different blog, Now just maintaining it under one